a splinter misunderstood
by heavenlygothicgirl
Summary: Garcia walks by Derek's office and hears some very questionable sounds... what on earth could Derek and Spencer be doing! T for suggestive content


**A/N:this is my first fic were i make a situation have some kind of big misunderstandin. It may be funny or may not. and it can seem smut like at first... let your mind wonder and you might get a laugh at the end! I really dont like it but most artists dont like there work.**

**Disclaimers: you know the drill...**

Once upon a time, in a BAU office, placed in Quantico Virginia, there was a girl named Penelope Garcia. The blonde was on her way to take files to her office when she heard some interesting noises...

"Morgan please don't do this. I will be quiet." Garcia's ears perked up at the sound of her sweet lil' wonder-boy.

"Quiet pretty-boy, I promise I will be as gentle as possible." she scooters on over to the door to hear better.

"It's not to late to stop. You haven't even done anythi-" he is cut off, with a yelp.

"Just be quiet and take it." Morgan growls at him. _What is Morgan doing to my poor defe- okay not defenceless, little Spencey? Is he...? no, he would never do that. He loves Reid like a little brother. _She is brought back by some banging noises coming from Derek's office.

"Stay still! I am trying to not hurt you!" Garcia has never heard Derek so mean except to a suspect.

"I- it hurts... please... stop." Garcia's skin starts to crawl. _Derek better not be hurting my baby! _A soft moan escapes said baby's mouth. Garcia turns red. She looks up and down the hall to make sure no one else heard this. The hall was, thankfully, empty.

"don't touch it! I don't want it-" Spencer was cut off by a grunt from Derek. Spence whimpers one last time,

"Are you OK Spencer? I will take it out, just bare with me." Garcia has her ear against the door when she hears some more whimpers and a revealed sigh from Spencer

"Can I leave now?" he says close to tears. Penelope has had enough and storms right in.

XD XD XD

Derek was catching up on some paperwork like everyone else when he heard a whimper come from Reid's cube. He dismisses it and goes back to working. A few minutes later, he hears another soft whimper. Slightly worried he goes to check up on the noise maker.

"Hey kid, whats the matter over here?" he takes his usual spot on the corner of his desk.

"Nothing's wrong. Why would you think something was wrong?"

"Because you wont look at me and your voice just rose an octave. Come on Reid, you can lie better than that." he says teasingly. Reid gives him his I-will-humour-you-until-you-leave-me-alone-face. It is way to early for Morgan to handle Reid's stubbornness and leaves to finish his paper work. Reid goes to pick up his next thick, file and lets out a yelp. Morgan comes back over and stares down at Reid.

"What's wrong? Did you sprain your wrist or something." Reid looks away and mumbles something incoherent.

"Come again?" he looks at Derek with a pissed expression and says slightly more clearly,

"I have a splinter in my hand." Derek looks confused, then relieved, and finally lets out a laugh but quickly muffles it with his hand.

"That's it? You had me worried for nothing?" Spence snatches his file with his good hand.

"Yea,well, it still hurts." he growls at the bigger man.

"Alright, I'm sorry pretty-boy, but that is funny. How did you get it anyway?" he chokes out between laughs.

"If you must know, I was moving in a new coffee table." (you know looks good with glass top and wooden frame, but was poorly made.) Morgan couldn't take it anymore he lets out a laugh not caring that people were starring. Reid goes back to work. He stops when Derek finally calms down and spins him to face him.

"I still cant concentrate with you whimpering the whole time."

"Well why don't you go to your office?"

"Because baby girl says I should spend more time out here." Derek grabs Reid's wrist and hauls him to his office.

"What are you doing?" his answer is being pushed rather roughly in Derek's chair. Morgan goes to his desk drawer and takes out a set of tweezers and a pocket knife. Derek then takes Spencer's hand to examine the splinter. He takes takes the pocket knife and is about to slice the kid's palm when he yanks it away.

"What the heck are you doing?" he yells at the agent, holding his hand to his chest.

"Its in there deep. I need to open your hand so i can get to it." he tries to coax Reid into giving him his hand, but Reid is a stubborn man.

"Reid the pain will be gone if you just give me your hand. Do you think i would hurt you for no other reason then to help you?" the genius thinks for a moment and gives him his hand. In one last effort to stop the soon to come pain Spencer begs

"Morgan please don't do this. I will be quiet." Derek answers slightly annoyed

"Quiet pretty boy, i promise i will be as gentle as possible."

"Its not to late to stop. You haven't even done anythi-" he slits his palm mostly to shut him up but scares Reid in the process.

"Just be quiet and take it!" He growls. The profiler is taken aback but shuts up. Derek tries to grab his wrist but grabs the palm that he cut instead. As a result Reid scoots back in his chair making a good few banging noises.

"Stay still i am trying to not hurt you" Reid was tempted to tell him it was his fault for grabbing the wound, but decides better. Derek is frustrated enough. Derek _gently _grabs the reason for said frustration and starts to pull the splinter out.

"I- it hurts... please... stop." a moan of pain escapes Spencer's rose red lips.

"Don't touch it! I don't want it-" pulled out was what he wanted to say, but Derek has already grabbed the splinter. One more whimper escapes the poor doctor's mouth.

"are you OK Spencer? I will take it out, just bare with me." Spencer looks away for a few second then Derek brings his face back to look at him. He had pulled the splinter out. The thing is, it wasn't wood, it was a big sliver of glass.

"Can i leave now." his hand was bleeding and he just wanted a bandage and a nice big mug of coffee. Before he can get up Garcia storms in. She looks strait at Derek looking like she could kill him.

"What is it Baby girl?"

"_What is it baby girl?"_ she says back as if he said her knew dress made her look fat. "How could you do _that _to baby Spencer?" she yells hysterically. They both look at each other in confusion, Spence's hand out of her sight.

Reid asks "What did he do to me?"

"You poor thing! So innocent you don't even know what he did to you! Which is hard to believe when you can spout off so many statistics about rape." now the poor boys are in shock. They just look at her for a few minutes. Derek breaks the silence.

"I did not- rape him. I pulled out a splinter of glass." Reid shows hand and points to splinter. Garcia processes this information and turns five different shades of red. All she is able to say is,

"Well, who wants some home made cookies?"

o.O' o.O' o.O'

**A/N: strange right? It is not as good as the story i read but it will do. I mostly did this so you guyz would know i am not dead. My mom took over my laptop considering she cant leave the house so it will be awile till i am able to give yall real stories.**


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